My job is hard

A view from my desk.  These guys are LOUD talkers.  Makes focusing interesting.

It has been a tough couple of weeks at work for me.  I am trying to learn how to do calculations I have never done before and I find it stressful.

Actually at times, I find the very concept of my job a little overwhelming.  I am supposed to design things and make sure it is safe for people to live/work in.  I am supposed to make sure walls don't fall down, houses don't blow over, roadways don't fail.  If I really think about it, it kind of freaks me out.

Maybe I am just not cocky enough.  I think a lot of engineers have quite a bit of hubris when it comes to their intellectual capacity (which I think can be both a good and a bad thing).  I probably need to have more confidence.

In reality, my lack of confidence is probably a good thing.  It means I take my time.  I make sure I know what I am doing.  I double check and then check again.

But each day, I am reminded about how much I don't know.  I am sure everyone feels that way about their jobs.  This last week, it has been a little more in my face.